Oh, good one. Marriage. I married later in life (later 30s), to a major beauty queen (Miss <insert state name here>). I thought I was tolerant and easy-going. To my humiliation, it took me, well, far too long to become the person I thought I always was. I remain a work in progress.
And whenever I even look at another woman, I always remind myself, "Do you want to go through *that* again?"
Writer's Coin
· 1 year ago
I like these posts, especially the titles. As for this one, I've got the first two and want more, but the spirituality one is where I don't think I"ll ever get a hit. I have my own brand of "faux spirituality" right now, but maybe it's because I'm "young."
deepali
· 1 year ago
Good list. I would change #1 to travel, and add a separate item for "broadened experiences" - you don't have to go far to get that. Volunteering, taking classes, picking up a new hobby, being a tourist in your own town, a side job, etc, can all also broaden your horizons. But travel, I think, is unique, in that "the other" will never get so different as someone in an entirely different country.
I also think I take a broader approach to #2 and #3. I'm not married, but just being in a serious relationship can make you rethink everything you thought you knew about yourself. I think commitment to someone else changes everything. As for #3 - other people's kids can really make you rethink your priorities. I think more long-term and less about my lifetime ever since I started working in nutrition.
And I wholeheartedly feel the last two too! I often find that #4 sometimes enhances #5...
plonkee
· 1 year ago
You can look at other people's children and deeply say that the experience is not for you. I have no doubt that they change your life deeply, it's just not a change that I'm interested in.
Broadening is good. Of course you don't need to leave home to do it, but you really should. Everyone, but everyone should go abroad, everyone should experience being in a visible minority, everyone should end up discussing the foreign policy of their own country with a much better informed person from elsewhere. Experience is everything.
And, if you can't get excited about new things, what's the point?
Steve @ bripblap
· 1 year ago
Plonkee, sure, like I said I don't really think that anyone NEEDS to have kids. I just meant that if you do, it's an experience similar to any other life-changing experience. And you're right, broadening can sometimes be accomplished just as easily by sitting down in front of an internet-connected computer with an open mind.
Andy
· 1 year ago
Deep!
Agree with all points expect children. They are not necessary for completness but they will be what carries your legacy when you are gone. They are what you leave behind, for better or worse.
MoneyEnergy
· 1 year ago
Well, I can say I've experienced a few of those - a long term relationship if not marriage, and definitely those parts about experiences and wonder. I definitely agree. It's always good to move into new territories, physical and mental. Some times are better than others. As Timothy Ferriss said, do what you enjoy and what makes you feel good about yourself. But in addition to (or in place of?) marriage, what about the transformative experience of love itself?
Steve @ bripblap
· 1 year ago
ME, good point - but I think the experience of love is different than marriage. I love my wife but I think our experience is far different as a married couple than it is when we were dating. At both points we loved each other, but I think it's more complex now. (And I should point out that marriage is just a formality - I could be talking about a committed-living-together-couple just as easily).
But sure, I would add love at point 6, and not even just romantic love. Love in any aspect - platonic, romantic, abstract - is one of the key experiences in anyone's life.
bubelah
· 1 year ago
"All you need is LOVE"
1. Love for travel and new experiences. 2. Love for your significant other (husband, wife, bf, gf, etc...) 3. Love for children and childhood. 4. Love for God or higher being or religions. 5. Love for learning and knowledge.
All Comments
And whenever I even look at another woman, I always remind myself, "Do you want to go through *that* again?"
I also think I take a broader approach to #2 and #3. I'm not married, but just being in a serious relationship can make you rethink everything you thought you knew about yourself. I think commitment to someone else changes everything. As for #3 - other people's kids can really make you rethink your priorities. I think more long-term and less about my lifetime ever since I started working in nutrition.
And I wholeheartedly feel the last two too! I often find that #4 sometimes enhances #5...
Broadening is good. Of course you don't need to leave home to do it, but you really should. Everyone, but everyone should go abroad, everyone should experience being in a visible minority, everyone should end up discussing the foreign policy of their own country with a much better informed person from elsewhere. Experience is everything.
And, if you can't get excited about new things, what's the point?
Agree with all points expect children. They are not necessary for completness but they will be what carries your legacy when you are gone. They are what you leave behind, for better or worse.
But sure, I would add love at point 6, and not even just romantic love. Love in any aspect - platonic, romantic, abstract - is one of the key experiences in anyone's life.
1. Love for travel and new experiences.
2. Love for your significant other (husband, wife, bf, gf, etc...)
3. Love for children and childhood.
4. Love for God or higher being or religions.
5. Love for learning and knowledge.